Title: Light in the Dark
Disclaimer: Don't own Doctor who, he is owned by the BBC.
Spoilers SET AFTER DOOMSDAY. IF NOT SEEN DO NOT READ.
Summar Alt ending number 10 as set by Neth. they both fall into the void.
Light in the Dark
They held on with all they could, the air being sucked into the Void along with the Daleks and Cybermen. The Doctor and Rose smiled at each other across the small distance of the room, the light of the gateway blinding, hiding the darkness that lay within. Then the lever on Rose’s side sparked, losing it’s purchase as the gate became off line. Rose tried to stretch out her hand to grasp it, but it was just out of her reach. So she let go of the magna clamp and lunged for the leaver. The Doctor stood looking on, eyes wide and hearts in his mouth as she tried to push the lever up once more.
With a click and the feminine voice declaring “Gate online and locked” the suction starting up again with full force, pulling Rose’s body horizontal in the air as she tried to hold on. The Daleks whipping past in a blur.
“Hold on!’ he shouted across to her, her eyes locking with his, telling him she would try. But it was a loosing battle, they both knew it.
“Hold on!” he shouted once more as her hold became fingertips, then nothing at all. The lever snapped back to and fro from the force of the grip released. She began to fly backwards towards the breech.
“ROOOOOSE!” he screamed, hearts stopping. Her scream tearing him apart. In that moment he made his choice, and he let go leaping towards her. They collided together, wrapping their arms around each other fiercely.
“Doctor! Are you mad?” Rose shouted at him as they passed through into the darkness.
“Probably. But you said you would stay with me forever. Would be unfair of me if I didn’t say the same.” She buried her face in the crook of his neck.
“But you said you couldn’t give me forever” she whispered.
“No…but I can give you the same forever you give me.” He replied kissing her forehead in the darkness. Pledging to be with her all her life. She tightened the embrace, unable to see him before her. The blackness so thick, it was as if she had her eyes closed. Touches being the only thing letting her know he was there with her.
“You shouldn’t have come Doctor, you’ll die with me. You should have stayed,” she sobbed; she had condemned him to death.
“I’d be dead without you,” he murmured. She gave a laughing sob as she playfully hit him where she thought his shoulder was.
“You big Softie” then she hugged him once more, they stayed like that for a while. “What are we going to do now?”
“I don’t know, try to find a way out?” He replied
“But you said we couldn’t leave, said the breach would be sealed” she looked around the blackness, seeing flashes of light every now and then. She knew what they were and she gripped his arm tightly. “Doctor!”
He looked, seeing them also. They had to find somewhere to hide, but where? He pulled out the sonic screwdriver, the blue tip illuminating both their faces in the glow. He moved the screwdriver around; searching while Rose kept her eye on the flashing lights that could only be Daleks. She gasped as more joined the first.
“This way Rose” the Doctor called
“How?” there was no surface to walk on, no gravity, no time in this place
“Swim” he still had grip on her hand, they moved to god knows where. Rose trusting him as always.
They impacted into the side of something solid, the sonic screwdriver never stopping as blue arcs of light shot out of the darkness followed by the grating shout of “EX-TER-MINATE!”
She realised they were before the Time Lord prison ship, and the Doctor was opening it.
“Inside” he pushed her in, him following quickly behind, closing the door. Inside the ship was bleak, dark amber walls covered in burn marks from thousands of Daleks blasts. The place was huge, disappearing to a point in the distance. Rose let out a breath as the Doctor leaned against the wall.
“Well that was fun,” she said with a shaky laugh. The Doctor came over to sit beside her, putting an arm around her shoulder.
“Well you know me, loads of fun when I’m around.”
“So what now?” she asked resting safe against him.
“See if I can find the control room of this place. And try to get us out of here.” He got up and started to walk along the walls, seeing if he could find a doorway. Rose walking beside him not knowing what exactly to look for. She did not know how long they looked, but she found her feet dragging, her eyes drooping. Then the Doctor’s face was before her own. “Rose, your exhausted. Come lay down. Get some sleep while I look”
He guided her to the floor, taking off the suit jacket and turning it into a pillow for her head. She did not have the will to fight the sleep anymore, the scent of his jacket and him lulling her to slumber. Dreaming of her mother, happy with her father back from the grave.
The Doctor watched Rose drift off to sleep, his hearts so full, yet so angry at the same time. He had thrown it all away, his TARDIS, his life as a time traveler for this young girl. She had become an anchor, a ball and chain with which all his decisions were governed.
He thought back to the Time Lords. At how disgusted they would be for him for throwing all the history and legacy away for a lower life form.
“Don’t be stupid. You pretty boy. This is Rose you’re thinking about! A lower life form! HA!” a northern voice in his head suddenly deciding to voice it’s opinion
“Oh no” the Doctor sighed, continuing to look for the opening. “What you rabbiting on about?”
“You. How could you think that of Rose? The woman who save both of us, who took the Time Vortex into herself to save us. And you think of her as a ball and chain. You’re looking at her like those bureaucratic fops would have done.”
“She should have stayed with her mother!” the Doctor raged, looking at Rose’s form in the distance.
“So what? You expect her to stay behind after all we have shown her? I was right you are a stupid pretty boy!” the northern voice yelled at him.
“I am not!” he yelled back.
“Doctor? Who you yelling at?” Rose sleepily asked.
“No one Rose, just myself. Go back to sleep” she blinked at him a couple of times, and then shaking her head she laid back down.
“Now look what you did, you woke her up,” the Doctor snarled.
“So you do care then?”
“Of course I bloody care!” he knocked his hand on the wall as he whirled round. He cursed in Gallifreyian at the pain, shaking his hairy manly hand.
“Well it doesn’t seem like it. Blaming her for the choice you made. You are so going to have to make it up to her when you get back”
“If we get back..” the Doctor added sadly.
“Oh you’ll get back. By the way the door is behind you”
“You snarky git, you couldn’t tell me that before I went mad looking for it?”
“Ah but you had to go mad before you could hear me…after all you are talking to yourself” The northern voice argued.
“Good point” he replied.
He went through to the ships version of the console room, it was in a mess. There were pieces of wiring and conduits ripped out all over the place. The Daleks had certainly been trying to get out. But the Time Lords would not have been that stupid. He gave a sigh. This would take some time; he looked at his sonic screwdriver.
“Well old friend, lets get busy”
Rose was lost in her nightmare, the dark interspersed with flashes of Dalek lights. In it all was the Doctor, blaming her, hating her. All the worst words in the universe, from thousands of different planets all translating the same. Hate, anger, loathing all this and more.
She cried, tried to talk to him, plead with him, but it always the same he would disappear into the darkness, followed by his scream and a grating voice “EX-TER-MINATE!”
Rose sat up with a start, the blast-damaged walls adding to her fear for the Doctor, which became terror when she could see no sign of him. She got to her feet, spinning round seeing nothing but the fading walls in the impossible distance each way. But she calmed as she heard his voice, he was swearing in Gallifreyian. She walked towards seeing there was now a door in the wall that she was sure hadn’t been there before. She passed through, expecting to see the Doctor inside, but she was met with a pure white room. That became unblemished as the door closed without a trace of it in the wall.
She scrabbled around where the door had been; trying to find a seam but it was no use. She slumped against the wall. Now what? But then a light became into being in the center of the room, it was about the size of a beach ball, pulsing before her.
“You are not meant to be here lower life form. How did you gain entry to this ship?” a male voice, seeming to transcend time.
“The Doctor got us in” she replied her voice never wavering. If this prison ship were made by the Time Lords, surly it would not harm her.
“The Doctor? He should not be here. Show me all” it commanded, Rose felt the light enter her mind. It trawled through her memories of the Doctor, and how they came to be in the ship. Then she felt horror, loathing. “How dare you condemn him to this! How dare you corrupt the last of us!?”
“What?” Rose gasped as the ball pulsed red, advancing on her. But there was nowhere to go, the square room offering no escape. She felt it touch her mind and enter it to torment her within and without.
“He is the last of us, and because of you he is trapped here. We must remove the influence as before” The orb of now red light came closer, the edge of it touched her, making her sense fire in pain. She screamed as it coursed through her, her mind going into shock from the invasion. It searched; saw that she had been bad wolf, which seemed to make it more enraged. She was going to die, after surviving the Daleks, Cybermen and the void. She was going to die at the hands of a prison ship.
The ships console hummed to life as he reconnected the power conduits, he laughed in glee as the console hummed with life. He walked around the white console marred by oil and scratches made be Daleks. It was then he saw the screen flicker to life, it showed a white room, a ball of red light in the center, and in front of it writhing in pain was Rose.
“Rose!” he pressed a release and ran back out into the main area, seeing the door to the white room open with a hiss. He rushed in, sonic screwdriver pointed at the ball of light making it back off from Rose. He caught her body as she fell, kneeling down on the floor with her against his chest. The other hand still holding the Sonic screwdriver at the ball of light.
“Why do you stop us Doctor? We wish to free you” The ball pulsed in confusion. The Doctor almost snarled recognizing the voice of his people. The old defense system.
“And what exactly are you freeing me from?”
“From this primitive that has corrupted you, trapped you here” It replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“Corrupted me? Trapped me? She has saved me, saved thousands” the Doctor raged at this thing before him.
“She has tainted the last of our blood line, we can see her taint in this regeneration of you. And because of her and the feelings she has given you, you are trapped here. So we must purify you. And remove the influence.” It made to advance on Rose once more, her body jerking as it touched her mind again.
“Leave her alone!” the Doctor roared, the blue light bright on the sonic screwdriver as it hummed. The ball backed off again. “You will not touch her! I never followed your rules then and I don’t plan to start now. You are gone, dead; you no longer have sway here. Rose has done nothing wrong; she has proved what I always believed about humans. That they can grow and become more than what they are.”
“Then we are truly gone. You are not the last. You are a half breed, tainted blood.”
“Then if I am not a Time Lord, there is no more use for you” he raised the sonic screwdriver once more, the ball of light seemed to vibrated in the air before it exploded in a shower of twinkling lights.
The Doctor carried Rose back to the console room of the prison ship, sat down and held her to him. He didn’t know what damage the probe had done. The Sonic screwdriver told him that her body itself hadn’t suffered any lasting damage. But he could not tell what damage had been done to her mind. She had not woken the entire time and that him worried. He placed his fingers on each side of her face. He needed to look inside to see if there had been any great damage.
Inside her mind was nothing less than a maze, filled with dark paths. This was wrong, true he had never been in Rose’s mind before, but he knew it should not be like this. At the entrance to the maze was a gold wolf, he walked towards it, it just sat on its haunches and watched him approach.
“Why do you come here last of the Time Lords?” the Voice timeless as before, the thread of Rose woven into it
“I’m looking for Rose,” the Doctor replied, crouching before the wolf. “What are you doing in here? I took you from here”
“You took the Vortex yes, but you can never take me from her. I am a part of her. The link to her sister” the wolf replied.
“Sister? She is an only child” the Doctor was confused, looking around the darkness again.
“Sister not by blood, but by time. Forever linked we are now, the last TARDIS finds companionship with one who held her very being.” The wolf shook like a pet dog, to ruffle the fur.
“So, she is connected to the TARDIS? That’s Brilliant!” the Doctor was all energy, ruffling his hair. Then he was all seriousness, with concern in his brown gaze “So where is she?”
“She is in pain, her mind in turmoil filled with false truths, and her lack of self worth. Her sister is trying to call her, to ease the pain. But the darkness is too deep that she can not penetrate” the wolf replied sadly.
“Can you take me to her?”
“No, she is lost even to me. Only you can find her now. For it is you that is the cause of this pain” the wolf the disappeared much like the Cheshire cat. Leaving the Doctor alone in the darkness.
“Wait! What do you mean I am the cause?” but there came no reply. He sighed in frustration before walking forth. The maze was just darkness, just the feel of walls on either side. Soon he heard voices.
“What use are you?” a male shouting.
“Jimmy please” the voice of Rose, young and afraid.
“What use are you without money!” The man shouting again, and the Doctor wanted to hit him.
“Please Jimmy, don’t….Jimmy where you goin?” then the Doctor’s hearts froze, the sound of flesh hitting flesh, then Rose sobbing. He had an image of her on the floor, hand to cheek, with Jimmy towering over her.
“You’ll never be anything Rose. It was you holding me back, you that made the band fail.” The sound of a door slamming shut.
“I’m not worth anything…..” Rose’s quiet, resigned voice. Devoid of anything but despair.
“Don’t listen Rose!” the Doctor shouted out to the blackness. But got nothing. He continued on, various scenes of her past playing before him. From a child, the other children in the playground saying she was a nothing because she had no father. The times when the father had picked their children up…but never a father for her.
One of Jackie’s boyfriends, great to Jackie, but cruel to Rose when Jackie wasn’t there. Rose dropping a glass, the quick retribution of a hand and loud voice had the child Rose cowering in a corner. The quick vengeance of Jackie for her daughter, not the first man to get a slap and would not be the last.
Each time the Doctor begged the voice of Rose not to listen. But then they came to the day he changed, the day she took the Time Vortex inside herself. This time the voice was his own, but the voice of his previous self.
“You killed me Rose,” the northern voice full of loathing akin to the tone said to a Dalek.
“I’m sorry, I tried…I thought I saved you”
“You killed me Rose”
“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry” Rose crying once more.
“Rose, you didn’t kill me! I’m right here.” He called out. But now his voice spoke words he had never said, never would say to her.
“I didn’t want to come back. I would have stayed with Renette, but she wanted to see the stars. So I had to come back so I could take her. But by the time I got back she was dead. It’s your fault Rose. I could never love you. You’re just a stupid ape. An un-educated ape at that, how could you ever compare to Renette?” a snarl at the end of the words.
“I know…I’m sorry..” Rose’s voice defeated once more.
“Rose! Don’t listen! It isn’t me Rose!” he shouted.
“Yes it is” the voice right by his ear, he turned. Rose was chained by the blackness, before her an image that was she yet her eyes were wrong, dark, black like everything around. It was this Rose that spoke, not the limp form chained to a non-existent wall. “For we have seen it inside you”
“You only came back so you could take her to the stars, you did not think of Rose.” The fake Rose locked eyes with the Doctor, daring him the deny it.
“Of course I thought of her! Who are you?” The Doctor demanded, going up to the chained Rose and cupping her cheek.
“I am Rose” it replied.
“No you’re not”
“I am, I am drawn to her. Taking all the pain she feels, the truth” the fake Rose walked around the Doctor like a predator.
“This is not the truth. The Truth is she is a special being, a being that is priceless to time and the universe. That is priceless to me” he turned from the fake Rose to his. He needed to get her to wake. For her could feel her heart slowing. “Rose, you need to wake up!”
“Why?” the voice so lost
“Because this is a lie, you are needed. I need you” he took her face between his hands, trying to light the spark that had fled from her eyes.
“Why?” she asked again
“Because I love you” he stopped shocked a moment, that he had actually said it. Her head lifted on it’s own, her eyes locked to his. He saw the love returned a thousand fold. He leaned forward, placing his lips to hers. The warmth filtered through them both. As their love joined. Then he was withdrawn from her mind seeing her eyes slowly blink open.
“Doctor?” her voice confused and uncertain. He crushed her to him, burying his face in her hair.
“Don’t you dare do that to me again” he growled out, placing a quick kiss to her lips. She looked shell shocked a moment.
“So I wasn’t dreaming that”
“Nope” he smiled, then his voice was serious “why did you believe all that?”
“Because some of it is true,” she replied looking down at her hands.
“It’s not true!” he exclaimed
“But you were thinking it” she looked him in the eye, daring him to deny this.
“What? Thinking what? That you were worthless? Never!”
“It showed me, ball and chain you thought. Thrown your life away. That they would not approve” she was right, he had thought that a moment. But then he had started arguing with himself.
“I’m sorry Rose, I really didn’t mean it. It’s just; I have been the Doctor for so long, trying to be anything else scares me. But I swear I didn’t mean it. If I meant it would I have said I love you?” he looked her straight in the eye and she saw nothing but the truth. She hugged him tight, the darkness placed inside her by the probe now vanquished by the love she now felt for the alien in front of her.
The moment stretched to infinity as they looked at each other. The human who would give he life and soul to the Doctor and the alien who would give up his very being for Rose. Both moved as one, lips seeking the comfort that only the others could give. The kiss this time was pure comfort and love, the gentle caress of silk with so much promise. Finally they had to come up for air. They looked at each other, him with cheesy grin, her with her tongue between her teeth.
“So, you find a way out Doctor?” She asked as he went up to the console of this ship. Instead of the mushroom shape dome was a six-sided symmetrical shape, she could see the console would have once been pristine and white. Now oil a scorch marks marred it.
“I think we can, if only I could find a lock to our universe” he mumbled, walking round the console.
“What kind of link?” she came to stand beside him, the screen he was standing in front suddenly blinked and beeped to grab his attention. It was a lock to his TARDIS. She stepped back to give him access to the scanner…..and the signal went.
“Link with the TARDIS…..That’s it!” he grabbed her with a smile on his face. “You have a link to the TARDIS, you can guide us back!” he crushed her to him in a hug, kissing her fleetingly on the lips then he was gone, leaving her dizzy as he rushed to the console.
Rose watched as he started splicing in wires to the console. Then he was walking towards her, looking like some mad scientist with the wires in his hand.
“What you going to do with those?” Rose backed up.
“Don’t worry Rose, don’t you trust me?” the Doctor pouted.
“Of course I do Doctor.” She replied, walking towards him, she placed her hands over his chest. One above each heart, he smiled down at her then attached the wires to her head.
“Concentrate on the TARDIS, call to her”
Rose closed her eyes; looking for the song she knew so well, the song that was part of her. She felt the golden caress, the call in welcome, the fear that the TARDIS had thought she was alone in the Torchwood base. Rose felt comforted and sent the comfort back to the old girl, her sister.
The Doctor looked on, feeling the hairs on the back of his neck rise as Rose called the TARDIS, then the console of the prison ship lit up finding the lock it needed to get home. The Ship moved through the void causing no damage to the barrier between worlds. The prison ship came into existence beside the TARDIS. But then alarm klaxons began. The Doctor grabbed Rose and ran out of the ship, quickly entering the TARDIS. He Set the ship to move as the Prison ship, believing its prisoners were escaping folded the area in on itself. Until there was no remains left.
They stood in shock inside the TARDIS a moment, not quite believing they had escaped. Then they were jumping around the TARDIS in their glee, the TARDIS sending its joy along with them. The Doctor and Rose twirled around the console; until dizzy they fell to the floor, their laughter ringing around the console room.
“Doctor” she spoke finally, he head resting on his chest listen to his double beat.
“Thanks for coming after me”
“I’ll always follow you Rose. To the end of the Universe if needs be.” He took her hand, lacing their fingers in a tight bond.
“So where to now Doctor?”
“Further than we ever have before”
One can dream for a lifetime and wake to the nightmare. Or one can face the nightmare, and live the dream.
KITG: there we go, the last fic i need to write for this. hope you enjoyed my fics. See you in time